Lessons on the Book of Mormon 2020
Lesson No. Eleven

Modesty Is Pleasing Unto God

Modesty can be defined as actions and feelings which are tender, chaste, and delicate – The Book of Mormon prophet Jacob gave a powerful sermon at what today would be a session of General Conference originating from Temple Square.  It was directed to priesthood holders with their wives and children present.  Jacob began by saying the God had revealed to him the evil thoughts of these men  (See Jacob 2:5).  Jacob continued:

“And also it greiveth me that I must use so much boldness of speech concerning you, before your wives and your children, many of whose feelings are exceedingly tender and chaste and delicate before God, which thing is pleasing unto God” (Jacob 2:7, emphasis added).

Modesty, like meekness and humility, is not in fashion in the world, however, it is a virtue that is pleasing to God (See Jacob 2:7) – The pamphlet For the Strength of Youth is a message specifically to the youth of the Church from the First Presidency, however it includes inspired counsel for people of all ages.  Of the 18 topics addressed by the First Presidency six of them are closely related to our definition that modesty is actions and feelings which are tender, chaste, and delicate:

Dating – “Choose to date only those who have high moral standards and in whose company you can maintain your standards. Remember that a young man and a young woman on a date are responsible to protect each other’s honor and virtue.

“Plan dating activities that are safe, positive, and inexpensive and that will help you get to know each other. Go only to places where you can maintain your standards and remain close to the Spirit.”

Dress and Appearance – “Prophets of God have continually counseled His children to dress modestly. When you are well groomed and modestly dressed, you invite the companionship of the Spirit and you can be a good influence on others. Your dress and grooming influence the way you and others act.

“Never lower your standards of dress. Do not use a special occasion as an excuse to be immodest. When you dress immodestly, you send a message that is contrary to your identity as a son or daughter of God. You also send the message that you are using your body to get attention and approval….

“If you are not sure what is appropriate to wear….ask yourself, “Would I feel comfortable with my appearance if I were in the Lord’s presence?”

Entertainment and Media – “Satan uses media to deceive you by making what is wrong and evil look normal, humorous, or exciting. Do not attend, view, or participate in anything that is vulgar, immoral, violent, or pornographic in any way. Do not participate in anything that presents immorality or violence as acceptable. Have the courage to walk out of a movie, change your music, or turn off a computer, television, or mobile device if what you see or hear drives away the Spirit.

“Pornography in all forms is especially dangerous and addictive….Use of pornography is a serious sin and can lead to other sexual transgression. Avoid pornography at all costs…”

Language – “How you communicate should reflect who you are as a son or daughter of God. Clean and intelligent language is evidence of a bright and wholesome mind. Good language that uplifts, encourages, and compliments others invites the Spirit to be with you. Our words, like our deeds, should be filled with faith, hope, and charity.

“Choose friends who use good language. Help others improve their language by your example. Be willing to politely walk away or change the subject when those around you use inappropriate language…

“Do not use profane, vulgar, or crude language or gestures, and do not tell jokes or stories about immoral actions. These are offensive to God and to others.

“Remember that these standards for your use of language apply to all forms of communication, including texting on a cell phone or communicating on the Internet.”

Music and Dancing – “Music can enrich your life. It can edify and inspire you and help you draw closer to Heavenly Father. Music has a profound effect on your mind, spirit, and behavior.

“Choose carefully the music you listen to. Pay attention to how you feel when you are listening. Some music can carry evil and destructive messages. Do not listen to music that encourages immorality or glorifies violence through its lyrics, beat, or intensity. Do not listen to music that uses vulgar or offensive language or promotes evil practices. Such music can dull your spiritual sensitivity….

“Attend only those dances where dress, grooming, lighting, lyrics, music, and entertainment contribute to a wholesome atmosphere where the Spirit may be present.”

Sexual Purity – “The Lord’s standard regarding sexual purity is clear and unchanging. Do not have any sexual relations before marriage, and be completely faithful to your spouse after marriage. Do not allow the media, your peers, or others to persuade you that sexual intimacy before marriage is acceptable. It is not. In God’s sight, sexual sins are extremely serious…

“Never do anything that could lead to sexual transgression. Treat others with respect, not as objects used to satisfy lustful and selfish desires…Make a personal commitment to be sexually pure. By your words and actions, encourage others to do the same.”

Testimony – One of the greatest blessings in my life is to have been married for 52 years to a wonderful and modest woman who is truly pure in heart.  Her “feelings are exceedingly tender, chaste, and delicate” and immodest behavior “pierces her soul and wounds her delicate mind” (Jacob 2:7, 9).

She looks to God with firmness of mind and prays unto him with exceeding faith.  She lifts up her head with confidence and receives the pleasing word of God, and feasts upon his love; and her mind is firm forever.  (See Jacob 3:1-2)

She has taught the virtue of modesty to her children by precept and by example, and they have learned this lesson well.  What more can a father desire?