Current Lesson No. Nine
Make Your Bed, Salute the Flag, Desire to Get Married - Change the World
Remembering basic military training – In my basic military training almost 50 years ago I learned and have remembered three important things that have impacted my life, and have relevance for many people today, especially young adults. They are make your bed, respect the flag, and desire to be married.
The importance of making your bed – We were taught to make our bed in a very precise way, and every morning our TI (training instructor) Sargent Mayberry came to our barracks to inspect our beds. It was expected that the corners would be square, the covers pulled tight, and the pillow centered. If it wasn’t just right or just because he wanted to he would rip the bed apart and you started over.
Something was backwards. I had taken a year off from law school and wondered if Sargent Mayberry had finished high school. In a few weeks I would out rank him as a commissioned officer on my way to pilot training. I now realize I was learning things far more important than how to make your bed.
Making your bed is important for many reasons. Admiral William R. McRaven, Commander of U.S. Special Operation Command, gave a commencement address in 2014 at the University of Texas whose slogan is, “What starts here changes the world.” He had 10 suggestions to help graduates change the world. His first suggestion reminds me why making our beds in basic training was a big deal, and why a made bed brings order to our lives, and teaches us important lessons. I agree with Admiral McRaven:
“If you make your bed every morning you will have accomplished the first task of the day. It will give you a small sense of pride and it will encourage you to do another task and another and another. By the end of the day that one task completed will have turned into many tasks completed. Making your bed will also reinforce the fact that little things in life matter.
“If you can’t do little things right, you will never do big things right. And if by chance you have a miserable day, you will come home to a bed that is made – that you made – and a made bed gives you encouragement that tomorrow will be better.
“If you want to change the world, start off by making your bed.”
The importance of respecting our flag – Each morning, no matter where you were, at the sound of the trumpet we came to attention and saluted the flag as it was raised. Each evening at taps, regardless of what you were doing, we came to attention and saluted the flag as it was lowered. Whenever a flag passed by we stopped and saluted. Respect for our flag and what it stands for became part of me.
Now some people publicly disrespect the flag as a way to protest. Admiral McRaven, quoted above, is now Chancellor of the University of Texas System. I relate to his recent letter on this topic.
“I…encourage your coaching staff and players to stand up straight when the National Anthem is played” to “face the flag and place your hand over your heart as a sign of respect to the nation.
“Honoring the flag does not imply that the republic for which it stands is perfect. Far from it, honoring the flag is our collective commitment that we will constantly attempt to get better as a nation, to improve as a people, and to use the freedoms we have been given to make the earth a better place.
“I spent 37 years (mine was 36 years) defending freedom of speech and freedom of expression. Nothing is more important to this democracy. Nothing! However, while no one should be compelled to stand, they should recognize that by sitting in protest to the flag they are disrespecting everyone who sacrificed to make this country what it is today – as imperfect as it might be.
“Those that believe the flag represents oppression should remember all the Americans who fought to eliminate bigotry, racism, imperialism, communism, and terrorism. The flag rode with the Buffalo Soldiers (a distinguished African American cavalry formed in 1866). It was carried by the suffragists (members of women’s organizations who pressed for their right to vote) down the streets of New York City. It flew with the Tuskegee Airman of WWII (a black highly decorated flying squadron). It was planted in the fields where Cesar Chavez spoke. It marched with Martin Luther King Jr. It rocketed into space on the shoulder patches of women, gays, Hispanics, Asian and African American astronauts. Today, it waves high over the White House. It is a flag for everyone, of every color, of every race, of every creed, and of every orientation, but the privilege of living under this flag does not come without cost. Nor should it come without respect.
“The nation and everything it strives for is embodied in the American Flag. We strive to be more inclusive. We strive to be more understanding. We strive to fix the problems that plague our society. But in striving to do so we must have a common bond; some symbol that reminds us of our past struggles and propels us to a brighter, more enlightened future. That symbol is the American flag.”
The importance of desiring to be married – After my mission Sue and I dated for 2.5 years before I went to basic training. We were active in school and fraternity/sorority life, but we had not talked about marriage. When I got to basic training I missed her immediately. Every day my desire to be with her increased. I knew other guys were interested, and that worried me. I did not want to lose her.
My desire to marry her intensified, and when I got home I was so relieved that she was not engaged. We soon got married, left on a yearlong honeymoon to pilot training, and began eternity together. By far the most important thing I got out of basic training was a great desire to be married.
Not everyone will have an opportunity to marry, but most will if they truly desire it. It is a great concern that many people do not desire to marry and have a family. The world does not encourage marriage. Some young adults, because they have no desire for marriage, “fail to launch” in the most important part of life. In most cases people who are successful and happy have a desire to be married.
Conclusion – I wish more young adults could have a basic military training experience like mine.